Brilliant New $5.34 Ladder Defeats Not So Brilliant $2.5 Billion Trump Fever Dream
by
Now, Mexicans still determined to come here despite our national mayhem have discovered a
new, cheap, go-to method of scaling Dear Leader's pesky, pointless pet
project. Using two lengths of light, cubed, readily available rebar
called castillo - ubiquitous in Mexican construction and LOL the wall
itself - they're fashioning hook-and-ladder
rigs; the rebar is fitted with steps, and connected to four thinner
poles bent into a U-shape to hug the top of the wall. The rust-colored
rebar is naturally, fortuitously camouflaged,
barely visible against the rust brown wall. And it's dirt cheap: Six
meters of castillo cost 99 pesos, about $5.34, at Juárez' Hágalo - or Do
It Yourself - True Value hardware store.
Last spring, the new ladders started turning up
near the El Paso section of wall, where the number of single male
migrants who mostly use them has nearly doubled in recent months; border
agents say the level of "evading activity" has likewise soared. Last
week, they found
9 ladders in one spot. Meanwhile, the whole stretch of border is
littered with rusted rebar - waiting on the Mexican side, yanked down on
the U.S. side, poking from dumpsters, their users long gone. Outwitted
and conscripted into ludicrous service, agents say all they can do is
pull abandoned ladders off the wall, cut them up, and hope they can't be
used again. "It's a very powerful, very powerful wall," Trump brayed at
a September rally there, "the likes of which, probably, to this extent,
has not been built before."
"A wise man lets a fool build a wall before choosing the height of his ladder.” - Socrates